Being Right, Making Wrong
More than likely you have read the wisdom of Eckhart Tolle, the contemporary spiritual teacher and author of the popular book, The Power Of Now. Within his writings he finds ways to express concepts and challenges shared by most everyone at some point in their lives. In his marvelous book, “A New Earth, Awaking to Your Life’s Purpose,” he discusses something we all create in common: Being Right, Making Wrong.
On page 67 he states; “There is nothing that strengthens the ego more than being right. Being right is identification with a mental position––a perspective, an opinion, a judgment, a story. For you to be right, of course, you need someone else to be wrong, and so the ego loves to make wrong in order to be right.” That idea was also discussed in detail many years ago by the late, great Zen advocate, Alan Watts, in his book, On the Taboo Against Knowing Who You Are.
Tolle then further clarifies the above statement by writing; “You need to make others wrong in order to get a stronger sense of who you are.” Haven’t we’ve all been there before?
Everyday, you come face to face with the challenge of being right or wrong. You encounter it at work, with you lover, your children, and on a broader level even the world in general. Many of you will barely survive your relationships due to the pressures of that ego driven force.
Harmonology is based upon the relationship of notes forming an interval. In music, any two notes form a vibrational pattern that inherently contains energy: dissonant, consonant, or a varying combination of both. Within a piece of music, that fecund energy gives rise to excitement, conflict, passion and tremendous beauty.
Our relationships contain that same rich and often challenging energetic interplay. Yet, by the shear nature of that energy, you may find yourself in a spiritual pressure cooker that will either run its course and dissipate, or transform and transmute you into a mature, loving person. Your life then will have become a natural and vibrant expressions of what it means to be human.
Your every relationship––whether based on a consonant or dissonant energetic interplay––must stand the test of being right or wrong. Know that “being right is identification with a mental position––a perspective, an opinion, a judgment, a story.” It’s all a product of mind, not of heart.
Just how do you cease that constant stream of mental effluent and gain control of your destiny? A simple yet powerful technique was suggested in Frank J. Kinslow’s book, Beyond Happiness, How You Can Fulfill Your Deepest Desire.” Dr. Kinslow states:
Sit comfortable and close your eyes. Just follow your thoughts wherever they may lead you. Don’t guide them or judge them. Simply watch them come and go. After you have watched your thoughts for 5 to 10 seconds, ask yourself this question, “Where will my next thought come from?” Then be very alert to see what happens. Just wait and watch. Kinslow, pg 19
“Do this exercise several more times and pay attention to the gap, the space between the thoughts. It may be fleeting but it will be there. The more you do it the wider and deeper the space becomes.” Kinslow, pg 19 Over time, you’ll find that the need to judge or follow a mental story softens and dissipates. You’ll find your heart awakening and a greater sense of peace and love permeating your life.
Now, go further into your wonderful relationships and more successfully weather the storm of Being Right, Making Wrong.